28
Jun
13

Angry Dad is Angry

image captured from the movie Big Trouble in Little China and is NOT a self potrait

image captured from the movie Big Trouble in Little China and is NOT a self portrait

I am sorely tempted to put my kids in the car, drive off into the Pine Barrens of New Jersey and kick them out of the vehicle, then take off.

Also I am actually hesitant to write this up right now because 1) I wanted any third post for today to be light and 2) I’m sure I’ll come off meaner than I intend.

But I started this blog to talk about the good AND bad of being a stay-at-home dad, so here goes.

Earlier today you might have read my post on the horrible multiplying dishes.

So earlier this afternoon I had to go do my dog walking thing. When I left, I directed the boys to take care of the dishes in the kitchen. I told Omega Child he was to load the dishwasher while I asked Alpha Tween to wash the pots and pans.

I was very specific about what needed to be done.

I’ll be honest, I didn’t expect it to be completely finished when I returned about an hour later. I figured it would be mostly done, which would allow me to surprise them with a trip to see Monsters University. We’d talked about possibly seeing it earlier in the week and I knew it was on their minds.

Plus, there are so few movies we can all see together, and very little time to do so anyway once camp starts.

Anyway, I expected there to be some work left which we could knock out and then go.

What I didn’t expect was to find virtually nothing done.

Omega Child was at least loading the dishwasher in his usual, snail-like pace. He drags his feet doing anything so, I expected there to be an issue.

What I did not expect was to find almost nothing done.

Well, at least they had straightened up the living room.

But the kitchen was largely the same mess which graces the picture in that earlier post.

I have to admit, I lost my shit.

Especially finding my eldest sitting on the couch.

Now his excuse….. well, it’s really irrelevant but it involved waiting for his younger sibling to finish his chore first.

This is not the first time this week he has 1) not done a simple chore I gave him and 2) blamed his brother.

There was some yelling, there was some frustration and there was some crying.

Suffice to say we didn’t go to a movie.

And it’s frustrating for me on several levels. First because I (usually) enjoy spending time with the boys, whether at the movies or riding bikes. But we can’t really do that now because there has to be some punishment.

I also hate being the guy who yells at his kids.

Which, when it comes down to it, is just part of being a parent. There are some people who enjoy yelling – at their kids, spouses, friends, clowns, people on the street – but I’m not really one of them.

posting pics of brownie sundaes is probably stupid when dieting....

posting pics of brownie sundaes is probably stupid when dieting….

(Though I will admit I love to argue and get testy in general conversation. Which is a whole other column.)

It’s one of those moments where I don’t love being a parent. Everyone walks away angry, sad and feeling like crap and nobody wins.

Unfortunately, life isn’t all ice cream sundaes.

Wait, is it?

No, probably not, dammit.

Part of being the bad guy, as far as I am concerned, is trying to drum some responsibility into their thick heads. You are told to do something and you do it, or there will be consequences.

That’s life and better to learn it now and hate me a little while than never learn it and end up a miserable fuck later on.

So yeah, I yelled. It’s happened before and will probably happen again.

Even if I hate myself a little for it every time.

Hey, are you following Dad Moon Rising on Twitter or Facebook? Why the hell not?

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3 Responses to “Angry Dad is Angry”


  1. June 28, 2013 at 8:36 pm

    well…I feel you.Last week I got the ‘I hate you’ speech from my 17 year old step-daughter,because she got in trouble for not doing something we have told her to do umpteen million times.When you leave the house throw the dead bolt so the door does not pop open,suffice to say I got home early from work(thank goodness) and had to get cats back in the house.She busts out with how much she hates me ,has always hated me,and will forever hated me.I asked her when she was moving out,then.Many friends have told me that if your kids don’t hate you a little you aren’t doing things right.So I must be doing great….it just hurts and it sucks.I am one of those who hates to yell at the kids,but sometimes…..they do ask for it.

    • June 28, 2013 at 8:41 pm

      Thanks Juliette

      Lucky I didn’t get the “I hate you” response, though it happens. I would imagine it’s one of the few ‘weapons’ (for lack of a better term) kids have in terms of responding when in a corner.

      Most of the time, the kids are good kids. But they do sometimes really, really screw up. And it’s happened a lot this week.

  2. 3 David
    July 2, 2013 at 4:04 pm

    I prefer to sneak up on them while they are busy not doing the job they were told to do. As far as omega being slow, I should just set you up a web cam and let you watch my children working. In any case, I would have gone to the movie without them as the punishment.


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Reading: Dead Beat by Jim Butcher Listening to: The Heist, Macklemore Watching: Damages

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